Well, dear readers, life certainly has taken a turn! I have spent the better part of nigh on four years crafting a nest for myself. After God helped me heal and helped me learn to walk on my own (surrounded by family and friends), this is a point where I am being kicked out of the nest.

I wrote in my last post that I was getting married and I want to thank you all for your wonderful comments! Thank you! I was touched by your comments and well wishes. What I failed to mention was that I was going to pull up stakes and move to Texas. I gave my notice at work and had the biggest panic attack that I have had in a long while. The panic did not stem from the decision to marry, nor from whom I am marrying... no, the panic came from pride. I had to drill it down to the actual emotion or feeling and that is what I have come up with. There was a certain amount of pride in making it these 3+ years on my own. I learned to live by myself in my apartment after 45 years. I earned my own money and paid my own bills. I started a retirement account on my own. So many "grown up" things that I had begun on my own. I was saying goodbye to the "on my own" woman. She has been a strong woman, but a lonely woman. She worked hard, learned a lot of lessons, and relied on God and family/friends to help get through this rough patch. And she did. It's sad. It's also a moment filled with some pride and a little hard to let go.

It's funny how the thing that you long for (companionship)can bring some sadness (independence). I have learned though, I can carry this independence with me into my new relationship in a healthy and productive way.

No matter how old you become, God is never going to simply leave you alone unless you stop listening to him. He is interested in us becoming what he has intended us to be... no matter how long it takes. Praise Him for seeing in me what I cannot see.

Well, I will post a picture of my gorgeous ring tomorrow! Tim is spoiling me, that's for sure. LOL.